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Exhibit A: Half-Eaten Broccoli on the Floor

Today I woke up to find the above specimen of half-eaten broccoli on the floor. The mystery is not who ate the broccoli. Powers of deduction point to my cat who shows no hesitation to eating things cats typically shouldn’t ingest. No, the mystery is where the broccoli came from. This broccoli is fresh and new. However, I have not brought broccoli into the apartment in weeks. No leftovers, no takeout spilled on the floor.

Where did it come from? Did someone throw a piece of broccoli through the window? Did it manage to hang like a dingleberry from my clothes picked up from the outside, and if so why does it look so fresh? Did someone break into my apartment searching for a place to eat their fresh bowl of delicious steamed broccoli, and the cat managed to steal the only evidence he could to alert me?

Perhaps I’ve uncovered a biological anomaly and this broccoli is in fact a relic of discarded ambitions to cook a healthy meal for once. I’m having a serious internal debate whether to bag, tag and ship this broccoli off to intelligent minds for thorough analysis or throw it in the trash to get it out of my mind.

This is bothering me.


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Posted on March 9, 2013 by Sarah · 2 comments

2 comments

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